Video Killed The Radio Star

[vid-ee-oh kild th‚ÄČuh rey-dee-oh stahr]: This was the first video to air on MTV. The network launched August 1, 1981, and this provided the first evidence that MTV was going to make it.

Firsts. Everyone has them. The first time they fell in love. The first time they went on that scary road. The first time… well when they had sex.

I remember the first time I had sex. It was so romantic. In a white pickup truck in the front seat on literally the side of the road. I lied to him and said I had sex before. It didn’t seem so much to me, a few days later he told me that he loved me.

I dumped him.

Dan was probably a nice guy. I remember him being a nice guy. He played baseball and transferred to my university for some unknown reason. Dan was a nice guy and it probably was the first time someone was so cold to him. I was a very bad girl.

I paid the price though. I spent the whole year getting in fights with a group of girls who loved Dan, but hated me.

I don’t remember when I had my first experience of remembering how I am gay. What I do remember is that after Dan, I was pretty easy to get into bed by most guys. At least guys I did not care about.

I stopped having sex with boys like Dan.

I remember my first date in Japan. A nice guy named something that I had a good time with. We met at the airport of all places. I broke up with him because he was worried that I missed a “scheduled phone call”.

I wasn’t having it, and no we never had sex.

My ex husband and I had sex, but he was a raging alcoholic that had a temper and not just verbally if you catch my drift. We used double birth control. I was not having a kid with him, I was smart enough for that.

The first girl I fell in love with was not something I realised at the time, but she was a girl I went to school with. I talked about her earlier. I did not realise that I would have those feelings for someone. As far as I look back, I wrote about her earlier here.)

To sum things up for those of you that do not have the energy to read a whole other blog post. I met her at a slumber party when I was like 14 years old. For some reason I wanted to talk to her so badly that I spent the next two years in High School writing her long notes. Luring her by writing each time a new page of a story in exchange for her writing me back.

I tried to talk to her on the phone or see her in person. All were a total disaster.

BUT every time I put a note in her hand my pulse flew up into my throat and I wanted to die right there on the spot. Eventually it just got easier for someone to deliver the notes instead.

I never thought about kissing her or anything. It was a mental thing. It was the first time I was in love with a persons mind.

I remember the first time I met my ex wife. It was at a club. A friend of mine knew her from High School (they worked at the same place back then) and introduced her to me. We danced, we drank too much and when she touched me, my head exploded.

She was engaged at the time to a guy. She dumped him for me.

We got married. It was her first divorce, me being the veteran I am it was my second.

I remember when I met my wife. I brought my daughter with me and we went out for pizza. Me (according to them both now) who is usually quiet was talking up a storm. We both had pizza with pineapple and ham.

We went to her place, and fell asleep there. All three of us passed out after a long night of talking.

My kid was there, so we did not have sex on the first date. A good sign that it was something I was going to care about.

April 24 we met. That day I will never forget.

Wait I am going to ask her (she is sitting across the kitchen table playing a computer game)

“Babe… what day did we meet for the first time?”

“A Friday I think” she said why clicking away “Uhhh I don’t remember, That is something you would remember”

And who says my wife does not know me? Ha ha

I do remember the first time I had sex with a girl. It was while I was driving a red pickup.

So it seems to have been a theme of mine to have sex for the first time in pickups on roads in Texas of all places.

I miss that truck. I probably never should have sold it. It still is my favourite car ever,

I remember the first and only time I tried to kill myself. I was a teenager who decided to try to overdose on narcotic pain pills. I just wanted for the first time to escape. I did not make it dramatic or tell anyone I was going to do it. I just took about 20 of them and hoped for the best.

I started o throw up. No one rushed to my side, my parents thought I made too much noise and yelled at me to be quiet,

I learned trying to kill yourself is the loneliest thing you can do. So I stopped with that too.

I remember the first time I tried a drug, It was at a New Years Eve party across the street from my mother. New years eve 1999. I smoked some pot and had an awful time. I thought my ass was going to explode when it was just that I needed to fart.

I tried it one more time again. I got sick. I learned the hard way to not do that again.

I remember the first time I drank alcohol. We were 12 and at my house for a slumber party (the first and last time I dared to have most of my friends at home). We got a hold of my parents liquor (they indulged in other things if you catch my drift) and we mixed everything together.

I remember many times after that me holding my head over a toilet and saying those charmed words we always used to say:

“I am never drinking again”

It took me awhile hating being hung over and taking mood stabilisers to realise that drinking is not such a good idea so I have quit it.

It feels good not to drink anymore. I don’t miss crawling over the toilet and pledging to never drink again.

I do remember when Video Killed The Radio Star came on Mtv. It was back in the days when music was first and video became legendary.

It was the first time I fell in love with music, and that was a beautiful thing.

One thought on “Video Killed The Radio Star

  1. Calandra.. You are so funny with your
    Every First stories.

    I am trying to read all and every blogg you wrote but i was so busy lately.

    thanks for the stories, they are all inspiring.. i always looking forward for a new one.
    See u when i see you!



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